people keep asking me cheer up . i'm sick and tired of that !
not that i don't appreciate , i do , it's just that , i can't cheer up !

imagine if you lose someone you really love .. how would you feel ?
and to add on , that guy is someone who treats you really well ..?
and it hurts to know he doesn't love you anymore ..

i know i promise to forget him .. but , i really cannot do it ..
once the image of him appears , tears appears too .
i can't seem to get him off my mind ..

i know there isn't a chance of us patching ..
because he doesn't believe in patching ..
but why can't he change his thinking for the sake of me ?
if he just lets go like that , how could he manage in the future !
can't he just give me another chance or something ?

some patched relationships go well , why can't he think positively ?
it's the first time i feel about someone this way .. really .
i use to don't bother about breaking up , and think nothing about it .
i cry for the most a day and i give up ..
for this relationship , it's different ..
i can't seem to left go easily or even let go at all .
i am crying almost everyday .. i think of him so much ~

last night i dreamed that he had a new girlfriend .
all i did was cry there .. will the dream be true ? sigh ..

i can't seem to get him off my mind ?
can't he change , for the sake of the future ?
and believe in patching ? i want him back so badly ..
as each day pass , i feel like shit .. the feeling sucks ..

i'm so not used to not calling him bee ..
not calling and sms-ing him every night ..
not meeting him after school , and not disturbing him ..
i miss his silly actions , his stupid face , the way he dote on me ..
i miss times when he ang gugu me .. when he pinches my face ..
when he tickles me , times when he call me darling & fatass .
when he sings gui ji to me , i miss his singing .. and everything .

why did things turn out this way ? can't they come back ?
i'm not used to living life without him .. it just doesn't feel right ..
can those times return ? i highly doubt so =(

i miss you , so much ..
what am i suppose to do ?